Wednesday, November 30, 2005
 today melanie and i went on the quest to find the perfect shoe. perfect shoe meaning a shoe that replicates her present shoe that is so last year therefore so difficult to find even after contacting aldo headquarters that we have to search all over toronto. everywhere. they are just that comfortable.
so we walked and walked and talked and talked and ate semi-good crepes and not very good smoothies and decided that winter, yes winter, had come and that clothes must from this point forward reflect that fact.
we also tried to get a new case for my new camera that outrageously came with no case despite the hefty price tag and we were unfortunately shut down by the sony people as their cheapest (49.99) case was not stocked. assfaces.
i bought a pretty blue shirt from zara to compensate for this loss.
the mommas were all out and up in arms, using their baby strollers as shields to clear a path where no path exists. also out were really slow people, people walking in groups preventing any passing, people stepping on the backs of your feet from walking too closely, and people who randomly stop in front of you and almost force you to walk into them. my favourites.
queen street was fun, and we went to so hip it hurts to bring back old memories and it was all about weird karma with one more astronaut playing on the music system and expectations of my uncles and girlfriends (now wives) sitting on the couches up there before a concert. old memories of melanie and i getting served our first alcoholic drinks underage at montanas on a school trip at 1:00pm in the afternoon when we were 17. this is the stuff dreams are made of i tell you. |
Monday, November 28, 2005
 pornpornporn. penis penis penis. brock thinks that he can get fired if i write or look at this stuff on his work computer that he brings home and that i use to surf at night because the computer i spilled pepsi all over in a fit of rage against brock has been consumed by futureshop. i brought it in when i moved to TO 4 weeks ago and they said they would call me the next day to tell me what they would be doing with it and it has now been four weeks. i think futureshop is always like this considering my friend had the same problem, but the guy there gave me the best advice anyways so i'm not really concerned. he told me to get a new computer. i'm taking it. i'm kinda sad that nick and jessica broke up. i loved newlyweds and even though jessica is a horseface and nick is like ken (of barbie and ken fame) they were amusing to watch. i love madonnas new song. i'm thinking of downloading it to my new phone as a ringtone. would that confirm my loser status? my new phone is so cute and sweet and i love it. and brock made me get the pink case, so it is even cuter and sweeter. music is so inane. all this new shit where the bands think they are the GREATEST THING EVAR!!!!! even though no one will remember their names in a year. they'll probably end up in a gutter fucked up on splenda sniffing or something. and they won't even be able to remember their own names. ha. even the muchmusic vjs are like that. they think they're so cool and all they do is end up on entertainment tonight canada or something. |
Friday, November 25, 2005
brock just bought me the complete works of jane austen and i'm so excited. and it was such a steal at 12.99. we're also going to see pride and prejudice tomorrow. i am definitely in the process of sissifying him, what with the harry potter last weekend and pride and prejudice this weekend. poor boy. the other boys will probably make fun of him now. or completely relate to him and his polished exterior. i guess urban boys are a different breed. i took some pretty pictures today, of the rockin' LCBO thats up my street (which by the way totally rocks -- its that converted train station on young near summerhill for anyone who lives around here. it's huge inside and pretty much an alcoholics heaven. or hell i guess.), the fresh snow on those plants that smell like marajuana at the park, the people looking at me weirdly because i'm taking random pictures in downtown toronto, of the house i'm living in, of me, of brock, ect ect. except i can't post them because brock fell asleep before i could get him to figure out the software to install on his computer to get them here. i have a sneaking suspicion though that because this is his work computer there is some sort of block on installations. hopefully he can get around that. i mean, the guy has two degrees. and one of them is on computers.i have to work tomorrow and its making me feel depressed. already i know that i don't like two people who work at the store (one is a twerp, the other calls me 'kiddo' despite the fact that i'm three years older than her. bitch.) and that this could lead to a dramatic situation whereby i storm out in the middle of a shift in a fit of range and hate starbucks for the rest of my life. it's so easy to get caught up in the whole brainwashing process, but then you realize that the whole thing is so hypocritical and that most of the people there are morons. and the customers treat you like you're the biggest idiot alive, when you really have far more intelligence than they could ever hope to possess. yesterday i officially became a barista and it was all so much bullshit. i guess its easier to put up with it all when you have to work at a place like that, and easier to knock it when you have the option to leave and still live relatively well. i give me one more month. hopefully this election coming up will pay off for tara with a job.
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Thursday, November 24, 2005
i'm so excited cause i bought my camera today and cant wait to take pics. its charging up and its so pretty. i bought it in black, and while i liked the new super slim and stylish sony cyber shot this one had 7.2 megapixels and a rockin' shutter speed. i also bought some cool boho boots from aldo. the streets of toronto have never seen anything so stylish.
tomorrow i will wander and take fantastic pictures. yum.
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Tuesday, November 22, 2005
i went out for drinks and eats at the rose and crown at young and eglinton with a friend last night and it was so fun. and that was after my 5:30am shift. today i learned how to work the espresso machine and i'm glad its so big and that i'm pretty much hidden by it cause then the customers won't see me swearing at them and their fussy drinks. venti triple shot extra hot no foam lactaid latte my ass. i also got my thesis bound and now its all professional looking. in my acknowledgements i thanked my cat. also brock, my advisor and my committee, but especially the cat. am i the only one who watches gilmour girls religiously? brock hates the show and i'm always secretly glad when hes late home from work on tuesdays so i can watch it without all the deprecating comments. today he asked me if i knew anyone who watched the show (or 'that crap' in his language) and i really couldn't think of anyone. weird. some people have to watch it or it'd be off the air.i just packed away half a huge package of jellybeans. gross. but tasty. i can't wait to get my camera so i can start taking pictures.
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Monday, November 21, 2005
5:30AM shift. 'nuff said.gone zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz'ing.
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Sunday, November 20, 2005
yesterday i went shopping at the eatons centre and on queen street toronto and it was fun. i bought this rockin new coat from le chateau that is a tweedy jewel blue and a nice brown zip up sweater from zara and a cream cool knit sweater from american eagle outfitters. oh, and these really nice earrings from there too. cool.so then we had a brief fight, which is pretty normal given my love of shopping and brocks general hatred of it. i won, and we ended up going out for a nice sushi supper. brock's treat. then we went and saw harry potter and the goblet of fire at the paramount theatre near queen and john and despite the incredibly scary escalator (which i hate and make a total moron of myself in front of other people but man, i'm desperately terrified of heights), we made it up and got only okay seats. it was a good movie though, better than 1 and 2, but not as good as three. mike newell did a good job on it though. considering the length of the book, he had to cut a lot of stuff out, like motives and back story and such, but it came together in the end. i'm glad i read the book though. but honestly, ever since reading the half blood prince, what drew me to the franchise and made me love it was kinda ruined.i work the 5:00 am shift tomorrow so today i'm gonna get some bronzer so as i don't look like a ghost and scare customers away. i think the santa claus parade is today too, so maybe i can talk brock into catching some of that. but probably not. he is the grinch.
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Friday, November 18, 2005
i just took brock out for an awesome thai meal at this swanky thai place down the street. top-notch service, and the food was pretty good too. we ordered mango shrimp rolls, a chicken basil 'basket', and mango chicken and meat satays for entrees. it rocked. a bit on the meaty side though. tomorrow i am going to watch harry potter and the goblet of fire. hopefully i will buy a new winter jacket given that its fucking freezing here and my old winter coat has no working zipper. also, i really want to see that catherine the great exhibit at the AGO. maybe we'll do a romp on queen street or something. queen street is always fun. all day at starbucks you get these free drinks, to the point where you no longer eat food but exist solely on liquid. did you know that an eggnog latte has 29 grams of fat? i myself have always preferred the non-fat tazo chai. i'm not a big fan of steamed milk and the smell makes me feel sick. the amount of sugar i consume makes me psychotically happy though; i'm usually more withdrawn. maybe its all part of the brainwashing process.
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Thursday, November 17, 2005
last night americas next top model was pretty awesome. i think i want kim to win it all now. and lisa being kicked off? man, was that a surprise. i mean, she wasn't my favourite person on the show or anything, but she there was pretty much no indication that it would be her to be kicked off. starbucks is still fun. maybe i'll run a store or something one day. oprah actually has a pretty cool show on right now. it's about when people first know when they're gay. brock's mumbling about how its not the 'fun' kinda gay show and how it sucks, but oprah's not gonna have hot lesbians slicked up and rubbing breasts anytime soon on her show, so what she has on right now is actually pretty interesting. it's so cold out today. and it's only 0 degrees. imagine how i'll feel at -30....brrrrrr......but at least it gives me an excuse to get a new winter jacket. i already have black, so i was thinking something a bit trendy. there is that blue that is totally in right now. or maybe i could go all british classy. a nice tweed. man, i'm so deep. foucault, camus, nietzsche, have nothing on me. i wonder what their winter jackets looked like though. ugly, i bet.
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Monday, November 14, 2005
even though we bought over $100 worth of groceries this weekend, neither or us felt that anything in the refridgerator was sufficient for supper. well, more me than him. deciding to try out the fish shop up the street (which we weren't even sure sold fish and chips), we saw it was closed. and seeing that the rosedale diner was right across the street we decided to eat there. thinking the word 'diner' meant cheap quality food, boy were we surprised when we sat down. $29 for an entree? $23 for a piece of salmon? $9 for a caesar salad? but it was too late to leave. so we settled each on the $13 dollar burgers and hoped for the best burger in town. the burger arrived in a pita bun. without toppings (they were on the side). it was more interesting/unusual than amazing. the frites were pretty awesome though. cut small and fried with onions they were delish. it came to $40 dollars with tip. yikes. for two people looking for some simple pub fare, it was a bit much.
all day today i made frappachinos and did coffee tasting. starbucks is a complex corporation, with hundreds of pages needing to be read before training can be complete. i also spent a couple of hours doing computer modules that were mindnumbingly boring. i realized that they were designed for the lowest common denominator, but it put me in a similar frame of mind as when i became a TA--I really am smarter than a lot of other people. You can forget that once in a while. Academia can make you feel pretty dumb sometimes. I have more training for the next couple weeks, including a day long barista session at canada headquarters tomorrow, but its not too demeaning. The people at this location are really nice, and the benefits totally rock. I think that when i eventually step up the search for my 'real world' job, i might keep this one at starbucks for a bit to keep the perks.
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Sunday, November 13, 2005
 today i slept in until 12 and it was beautiful. brock left around nine, so i could stretch out and glory in my independence. usually i can't stay in bed that long, consuming myself with feelings of guilt and my laziness. i eventually left the bed and went upstairs to make this amazing breakfast i had planned the night before. you get some nice cuts of ham, make a cup of them in a muffin tin, cut up onions and a green pepper and place them in the bottom of the ham cups, then crack an egg and cook the creation in an oven. beautiful.the harry potter premiere is on tv right now, and its making me a bit excited. goblet of fire was my favourite book. an action packed adventure. brock has already made known his refusal to go to see the movie on opening night. i may win yet. i'm also researching a possibility for christmas that brock and i have talked about. going to montreal. could be a blast. sometimes if i'm bored i go to the imdb.com to check out what movies are coming out. a real life pocahontas, a remake of robocop, curious george with will ferrel as the man in the yellow hat are all in the works. do you find on sundays that there is always a michael douglas movie on? especially if it has demi moore in it. disclosure was on this morning and i think i've seen it way too many times. and can never remember what happens. michael douglas tries to press a sexual harrassment suit and it's so outrageous. the decade these films were influenced by erode almost any individuality of director taste. wall street, indecent proposal, fatal attraction, basic instinct, they're all the same. greyish, rainy, muted. or maybe its more that michael douglas has all the artistic nuances and acting ability of an elephant. |
Saturday, November 12, 2005
in the last two weeks i think i've bought 5 different magazines. i'm not usually the magazine buying type, but i've been either bored or subject to the most inane bus drive in the history of bus drives (toronto to waterloo = ass). so i'm all up on glamour, cosmo, that other magazine, and one more that i can't really remember. oh, allure. brock suggested i buy it cuz the ever hot rachel mcadams is on it as opposed to jane which had nicole richie on it.i went to the royal winter fair today and it was smelly. there was this one sheep that baa'd so loudly that we stood and looked and proclaimed it the coolest sheep ever. we'd name it baab if it was ours. too bad its not. i wanted to see the butter sculptures but we missed them somehow. there was this pumpkin that weighed over 1000 pounds.then we went to the eatons centre to get me some work-appropriate clothes. i swear, they pump the smell of christmas into the air there. some sort of cranberryish aroma. and they have all that shit strung up on the roof. oh, and of course the insane amount of retards that decide that saturday is a good day of the week to stroll, especially if they have an SUV size stroller acting as a shield. by the end of the day, i was starting to step on people as if they didn't exist. my personal coping mechanisms for morons.i could end this post with some witty remark on morons, but i'm not that clever anymore. i think i may becoming one of them, or at least blurring my self-defined definition of what constitutes a moron.
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Thursday, November 10, 2005
 bananas Inbox
XXXXXXXX, Brock to me
10:36 am (11 hours ago)
It’s bananas, B-A-N-A-N-A-S.
It’s bananas, B-A-N-A-N-A-S.yah, that's my boyfriend. my little weirdo. i can't help but love him though. (recycled pic from summer) |
Wednesday, November 09, 2005
 i am now officially an employee of starbucks. i have been sucked into the giant coffee corporation that everyone professedly hates. it is my job before my real job, the one that gives me spending money and allows me to feel free from the constraints of dependency. i get excellent benefits, free drinks, a bag of coffee every week, shares in the company, a non-minimum wage salary, and a 40% discount on merchandise. nice. I should probably hate myself right now, but I don't. Self-loathing is so passe. |
Tuesday, November 08, 2005
So.
Yesterday, I was awarded my Masters of Arts in political science. It was pretty cool -- a lot better than the more anti-climatic awarding of a Bachelor of Arts. It was a pretty gruelling session, lasting an hour and a half. There were questions I could anticipate, question I didn't anticipate but answered well, and one could that I didn't anticipate and didn't answer very well. On the role of the Republic of Ireland in Northern Ireland. We spent probably 20 minutes going over the content of one footnote. Semantics really, over the concept of 'nation' and how I refer to the groups in Northern Ireland as unionist and nationalist rather than as catholic and protestant. Bosnia went over pretty well. They also liked my original theoretical framework. So I left the room. They called me back in and told me I was a success. I guess it was a really good paper too -- they all want copies for their offices to show other people how to do a thesis. Boo-ya.
So I am now no longer a student. For the first time in my life, apart from those early three years.
And to top it all off, tomorrow I have a job interview at Starbucks.
Oh, the irony of it all.
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Sunday, November 06, 2005
argh, i wrote this entire post and then i accidently deleted it. that makes tara angry. or, alternatively, lose her cool. grrrrrr......it was about dishwashers and upcoming dissertations. also about caffiene addictions and the trials and tribulations of an addictive mind. dishwashers referred to my uncertainty with using one (and the fact that i have never used one contributes to this uncertainty greatly), and how i did this morning and am unsure of how its going to turn out. the main problem was the little hole where the soap goes, and my inability to close the flap, leading to a dishwasher cycle with soap scattered all over the bottom of the dishwasher. is that the right way to do it?upcoming dissertations referred to my dissertation tomorrow. at 2:00 tomorrow i will know whether or not i have achieved my MA in the useless field we call political science. so when i get it i can work at starbucks or H&M with gutso. ha.and caffiene addictions referred to, gasp, my need for coffee. actually, right now i have this blinding headache and can't really concentrate on the task ahead (prep work for dissertation) because of this need for coffee. but brock's sleeping still (lazy) and i guess i should wait for him to go out and get coffee. although he doesn't even drink coffee, but that hippy concotion called green tea. i want this stupid dissertation to be over with so i can, among other things, go to the royal winter fair without that constant feeling of guilt. that would be great, shedding that awful feeling. but for someone like me, there is always that feeling coming from somewhere, pressing down on any ability to feel free. there will always be constraints. albiet self-created constraints, yet constraints nonetheless. it's not too easy to ditch these habits of mine.
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Friday, November 04, 2005
 so i lied. i'm posting despite impending busyness. right now i'm sitting in the living room, stealing various food items off of brock's plate. pouring honey genorously over everything. honey is yummy. friends is on, and brock wants to watch the matrix reloaded on tbs later. i hate tbs because they censor stuff, although that can get funny. instead of 'fuck you', you get 'sheep stew' or some other nonsensical pairing of words. censorship is for sissies. today i have gone insane.on a greyhound, where I was sick of bus travel. at wilfrid laurier university, where today was that assiness called laurier day. meeting a professor for a 15 minute meeting. getting delayed with my student loan again. taking the grt with a bunch of skankyass high school students. and getting back on the greyhound, where the traffic began in guelph.i'm back in toronto now. union station is nuts to the uninitiated, especially at rush hour. i grabbed a mango magic jugo juice with no mangos and got lost trying to find the subway. i got some bread from all the best and some wicked ginger snaps. i am a slut for ginger snaps. i want a camera now. to take pictures of everything while its new. the city, the streets, my hair. i already have it picked out. just a couple more weeks. a graduation present to myself you might say.yesterday i went to a new hairdresser who was not my courtney at all. i needed to get my roots touched up for my upcoming dissertation, and needed somebody -- anybody -- to do them. anyways, the lady i went to was a friend of my mom and man, if anyone needs clarification on the term cougar, this lady was one. while she was burning my scalp with bleach, i was told of her boyfriend, her sex life, her bar life, ect ect. she want to become a prison guard. she didn't understand my desire to touch up my roots because she prefers the roots look. her animal print shirt did her in though. she teased and hairsprayed my hair to death. it is so blonde now, it almost glows. |
Thursday, November 03, 2005
so i haven't posted in a while. i've been moving to toronto, getting to know about this fabulous house in the picturesque area we will be living in for the next eight months. it is indescribably cool. and the lcbo, which is the next street over, used to be an old train station and it rocks. and i now watch tv on the huge plasma tv over the fireplace. americas next top model was never better. even the cheese here rocks. i hung out with brocks aunt and uncle for a while too and they are super cool. brock's aunt took me out shopping and bought me a new suit with pants and a skirt from Zara. i'm getting, and have been, so caught up in everything that i've put my thesis at the back of my mind. a good way to avoid the inevitable stress, a bad way to prepare for the gruelling situation ahead. so no posting right now. preparation and unpacking will consume my time until monday. wish me luck!
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::stats
Age: 25
City: Toronto
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today melanie and i went on the quest to find the perfect shoe. perfect shoe meaning a shoe that replicates her present shoe that is so last year therefore so difficult to find even after contacting aldo headquarters that we have to search all over toronto. everywhere. they are just that comfortable. 
